Office of Civility

Consent for Sex

What is consent for Sex?

  • Consent is required for all sexual contact
  • Consent is a voluntary, sober, imaginative, enthusiastic, creative, wanted, informed, mutual, honest, and with verbal agreement
  • Consent is “YES” – only “YES” means “YES”
  • Consent is required for each activity – each time
  • Consent is an agreement between people BEFORE they engage in any kind of sexual activity.
  • Both people have to say “YES!” – clearly and freely

What is not consent for Sex?

  • Consent cannot be given by someone under the influence of drugs or alcohol
  • Consent cannot be given by someone under 18 years of age
  • Consent cannot be given by someone who is intoxicated
  • Incapacity, Disability, Manipulation, Force – that is not consent
  • The not absence of “No” does not mean “Yes”
  • Implied or assumed consent, even in a relationship, is not consent
  • Silence or when someone stops not responding – that is not consent
  • When someone says “yes” because they feel pressured or afraid – that is not consent
  • When someone says “I’m not sure” – that is not consent
  • When someone says “I don’t know” – that is not consent
  • When someone says “I’m scared” – that is not consent
  • Consent for one activity does not mean consent for everything
  • Being in a relationship does not give permission for sex with your partner
  • Consent given once does not mean always
  • Consent cannot be given by some who is passed out or sleeping

Why is consent important?

  • Demonstrates respect for both yourself and your partner
  • Enhances communication, respect, and honesty, which strengthens relationships
  • Provides for clear communication for type of sexual activity
  • Demonstrates respect for a partner’s personal beliefs and values
  • Builds confidence and self-esteem
  • Challenges stereotypes of rape and sexual assault
  • Challenges traditional views on gender and sexuality
  • Empowers a positive view of sexuality; eliminates entitlement one person feels over another
  • Communicates that neither your body nor your sexuality belong to someone else

If you are still struggling with questions about consent – watch the following Blue Seat Video